THE LORD OF THE BASEBALL DIAMOND / by Joseph Castorino

 

Seven-foot Sauron stands imperiously 

   like a goliath on the mound,

Wearing his glistening, gleaming armor, 

   he longs to be crowned;

His wind-up is Smaug-like and 

   slithering and serpentine

As if he’s been guzzling and gulping 

   hot Mordor turpentine;

Brimming with poison pride, he 

   frantically fires a fastball of power,

That rings through the air 

   as it aims to devour.

 

Recognizing the temptation, 

   Mr. Baggins the most honorable,

Surrenders to the Spirit and humbly 

   lays down a bunt phenomenal;

The baseball sneaks softly 

   down the third-base line

And Mr. Baggins thinks to himself, 

   First-base is all mine!

Then, like a slingshot, off to 

   first base he invisibly darts,

And the burglar makes it safely 

   because he’s so smarts.